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The Myth of the Perfect Mother: Finding Balance with Maternal Grove’s Shanna Nardone

Writer's picture: Maia Mothers LLCMaia Mothers LLC

At Maia, our mission has always been to support mothers—not just by creating beautiful, functional lingerie for maternity and postpartum, but by helping redefine what motherhood can look like. Too often, societal expectations paint an unattainable picture of what it means to be a "good mom." This pressure can lead to burnout, guilt, and a deep sense of inadequacy, especially during the holiday season. That’s why we sat down with Shanna Nardone, a life coach and founder of Maternal Grove, to discuss these challenges and how moms can reclaim their time, balance, and joy.


The Pressures of Modern Motherhood


Shanna works with maternal figures to help them find balance in their lives by dismantling the unhealthy societal narratives about motherhood. These narratives, she explains, start early—often as soon as someone begins their journey to becoming a parent.


Pregnant mothers are immediately bombarded with rules about what they can and can’t do. This can lead to an early and deeply ingrained belief that their bodies—and later their time—are no longer their own. For many moms, this feeling only intensifies after giving birth or adopting. Shanna described it as "the belief that your value comes from your sacrifice." It’s an insidious narrative, reinforced by societal norms, internalized guilt, and the unspoken expectation that moms should be able to "do it all."


Recognizing the Signs of Burnout


For many moms, these pressures manifest in day-to-day life. Maren and Frances, co-founders of Maia, shared personal examples of how these beliefs have affected them. Maren talked about the pressure to create a perfect Thanksgiving meal—spending so much time in the kitchen that she didn’t have a chance to enjoy the holiday with her family. Frances described how she gave up yoga, something that brought her peace and balance, because she felt she had to handle the morning routine single-handedly.


Both experiences reflect a common theme: the internalized belief that being a "good mom" means sacrificing personal needs for the family’s benefit. But this mindset often leaves moms feeling exhausted, frustrated, and disconnected—not only from their loved ones but also from themselves.


The Catch-22 of Motherhood


As Shanna explained, this struggle is a classic catch-22. Society tells mothers that prioritizing their own needs is selfish, yet not doing so often leads to resentment and burnout. Mothers may logically know that taking time for themselves is important, but the guilt and pressure to "do it all" make it difficult to act on that knowledge.

This internal conflict is compounded by external pressures. Many moms grew up seeing their own mothers manage both household and workplace responsibilities while projecting an image of ease. These learned behaviors can create a sense of inadequacy when today’s moms inevitably realize they can’t meet those same impossible standards.


Breaking the Cycle


So how can moms begin to challenge these harmful narratives? Shanna emphasized the importance of self-awareness. "The first step is simply noticing," she said. Pay attention to the moments when you’re operating on autopilot or when guilt or frustration arise. Ask yourself: What thoughts are driving my behavior? What emotions am I feeling? And what impact is this having on my well-being?


For example, if you skip an activity that brings you joy—like yoga or a coffee date with friends—because you feel like you "should" be doing something else, pause and reflect. Is that "should" helping you or holding you back?

Shanna also highlighted the power of perspective. It’s not about completely eliminating the responsibilities of motherhood but about recognizing that your worth isn’t tied to how much you sacrifice. Reframing these narratives can lead to healthier choices that benefit both moms and their families.


Moving Toward Balance


At Maia, we know that the path to balance isn’t easy, but it’s worth pursuing. Prioritizing your needs doesn’t make you a bad mother—it makes you a more present, engaged, and joyful one. As Shanna put it, "Your value doesn’t come from your sacrifice. It comes from being your authentic, whole self."


We hope this conversation inspires you to take a step back, reflect on your own experiences, and consider where you might reclaim time and space for yourself. Whether it’s saying "no" to an over-the-top holiday meal, carving out an hour for yoga, or letting your partner take the lead on bedtime, remember: You deserve care, too.


To learn more about Shanna's work at Maternal Grove, you can visit her website here.


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